No Subject. Ever.

I'm pretty sure that just about nobody reads my blog anymore. I could pretty much put whatever I wanted up here, and no one would even care(or comment, maybe). So now I'm going to put up that second piece of 'writing' I found in my room that was mentioned in my last post. Not that you'd know, because not only are you not reading this, but you also didn't read my last post either.


25 WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

1. At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in".
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling diamonds".
7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophesy".
8. Don't use any punctuation
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat. Keep a serious face.
11. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go".
12. Sing along at the opera.
13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.
15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
16. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Bottom.
17. **When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I won! I won! I won!"**
18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling "Run for your lives! They're loose!"
19. Tell your childrem over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
20.Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after you boss does. This is especially effective if your boss is a different gender.
21. Send e-mail to the rest of the company telling them exactly what you're doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."
22. Hi-Lite your shoes. Tell people you haven't lost them as much since you did this.
23. Send e-mail back and forth to yourself engaging yourself in an intellectual debate. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.
24. Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair-dancing.
25. Put a chair facing a printer. Sit there all day and tell people you're waiting for your document.


**My Favorite


(I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.)